Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Rule Of Thirds

To whomever,

Where I came from, they say that misfortune come in threes. Three days ago, my grandma was found in the balcony by my father pulseless and with no heartbeat. My brother came from school and gave her CPR. She came back to life. It made me think about what would happen if my brother was stalled on his way home. 

Two days ago, my youngest uncle was found dead on the vacant lot just across the street where our house is. He was shot four times. He used to deal crystal meth. He had a court case undergoing. I know he wasn't dealing anymore because of the case, and he was getting old. But he was shot four times; they said he had a gun and 8 packets of crystal meth in his pockets; they said he fought back. He didn't. 

There's a purge going on here right now. They're exterminating dealers and users without due process. They even kill the innocent and cooperative ones. They say it's for a crime free country. I say it's massacre.

I remember when I was young. Whenever I was on the way to school and my uncle sees me, he'd give me a hundred or a bunch of it. I didn't know it was drug money. But when I grew up and realized this, god, I felt so badass as a kid. Imagine, I was six and I spent drug money. What a wild childhood. 

His street name was Catorce, a pun on his last name, Portin. How cool is that? It's like he's in Breaking Bad together with Heisenberg. 

But all these fantasies aside, he was a kind person. He was my grandpa's son from another woman, but he loved my grandma and his half siblings. They all loved him too. He lived such a dangerous life. But he has loved and was loved. And that's all that matters. He was killed helplessly, but he's at rest now. He's still the most badass uncle for me. 

Yesterday, my mom has fallen ill. The doctors said it was her kidneys, there was something wrong with it. The test results shall come today, and she shall be treated accordingly. 

Why am I writing about these things? I just can't deal with the emotions right now shooting me from everywhere. I have become so sensitive about everything. This is the only way for me to comfort myself. This whole thing is pure selfish. And life is such a sinister kid. 

With love, 

1 comment:

  1. i hear you here, on the other side of the ocean & i hope you can find a bit of comfort in your own skin